Mom’s Nuts & We’re Okay

April 4, 2011

The abusers stopped by on Sunday. Mom is playing a “Let’s pretend we’re a great, big, healthy, happy family” game, but not my dad, and that won’t last long anyhow, and my kids didn’t fall for it. They are fading away and are miserable, disgusting, ugly creatures. I’m glad for that.

No triggers, no nightmares, nothing. We are in total control with them. When we motioned for them to leave they did. No kind words and hardly a goodbye. It was nice.

We have a plan in place should they want to stop by again.

It’s good to feel above and beyond them right now.

The week before my mom sent me a box in the mail. There was no note, just a photo album. The pictures were ones she had told us were missing nearly fifteen years ago. I didn’t look at all of the pictures, but the few I did see were of me naked (as a toddler) or in sexy poses. I remember  that some of those pictures had been in a certain album which had disappeared, but I have no memory of the pictures being taken. She wrote something either on the photos or ripped off pieces of paper, wrote on them, and put them with the pictures. It’s just crazy. I did ask my therapist to look at them last week and she suggested a couple of things: Place them carefully in a box and save them for much later to look at (right again, Meredith!), or take one picture at a time and journal about how I feel when I look at them.

I didn’t acknowledge that I received the photos and mom didn’t ask about them when she was here.

It feels good to get bored with their desperate tactics to try and regain some control over me.

It’s a relief that I don’t need to pop Xanax at the mention of them.

I still wish they would explode or fall into a whirling vortex of Chaos (hmmm….like “Event Horizon” maybe?), but I and my family can deal with their shit and they can’t hurt us.

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12 Responses to “Mom’s Nuts & We’re Okay”

  1. meredith Says:

    SHINE ON, SUPER-SURVIVOR!

    You and your family are just awesome, Lisa!

    wow. that is so intensely cool.

    Don’t you just love it, everyone? BOO-Yah!!

    ~meredith~

  2. Nansie Says:

    Wow Lisa…I hear alot of strength in your convictions and good for you! Your organization and control is inspiring! hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

  3. tai0316 Says:

    Oh my god, that photo thing bothers the heck out of me, on your behalf I mean. I’m glad you are rockin’ the strong woman vibe, you rule!

  4. kate1975 Says:

    Huge. I especially liked the part where you gestured for them to leave and they did, what a lot of control and power over them you showed. And at the end when you wroteI and my family can deal with their shit and they can’t hurt us.

    Super! 🙂

    Good and healing thoughts to you.

    Kate

    • roseroars Says:

      Hubby thought that was cool, too, and he’s the one who did it just to see what would happen.

      Thanks!

  5. castorgirl Says:

    Does your mother realise that she just gave you evidence against them in any legal proceedings they might bring about regarding access to your children? Show a judge any of those photos, and they’ll never see your children again.

    Their power over you slips away more each day. As Meredith says… Shine on!

  6. Brittany P. Says:

    I’m sorry you received those. I have been given such pictures as well and it’s difficult. Very good you are feeling control. You deserve it. What a sweet thing, and may it empower you.

    Take good care,
    Brittany
    http://www.butterflyclosures.com


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