“Emergency Traumatic Memory Response Team”

May 21, 2010

There are some younger parts inside who feel as though they are constantly assaulted. I understand that they took the abuse and now feel safe to tell me. It can be a real pain when it happens at school, in the store, at the bank, etc., so, in the event of these experiences happening in public I have created the “Emergency Traumatic Memory Response Team” (hereafter referred to as the ETMRT) inside. When the body memories or flashbacks become too much to handle, and I cannot safely keep them quieter, two amazing women gently take the memory/flashback/alter, surround her with love, acceptance, and safety and lead her to a room where she can relax and chill out.

I bet one million bucks (American or Australian) that most of you already have a system like that in place.

I wanted it to be more dramatic, like the television show “Emergency!”, but it was too scary and dramatic so I had to tone it down. It works very well and I can have a conversation with someone outside while tackling the inner troubles. The two women seem to actually enjoy having this responsibility, too.

Anyway, it happened again today and the response team did a wonderful job. That got me wondering about how many parts there are inside. I know some are incomplete, memory fragments, or created during one specific event. I am keeping track of any names I get and the information they can give me. Stupid me…..I thought of a number that I felt was appropriate and of course I was wrong.

This week (until my next therapy appointment) is supposed to be a mentally relaxing one DID-wise. The more relaxed I am, however, the more people on the inside want to communicate. That’s fine. I write down how they feel if I am near my journals, reassure them, and ask them to move into our safe space. If I’m out in public I call on my ETMRT. I’m trying to be la-la-la, easy-going, and not pushing myself to find immediate answers. And lo! Some of the answers come to me. Who would have thought…….. I am so pathetic. I should have learned that by now. Silly me.

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11 Responses to ““Emergency Traumatic Memory Response Team””


  1. Wow, some really great ideas there. And no, I haven’t got such a team organised in my system, so you can send me a million bucks thanks! 🙂
    Maybe that’s the difference between having a therapist who is experienced in treating DID and one who is not. We are SO behind in Australia – lucky to find a therapist who understands what DID is, let alone have experience in treating it!

    So glad it’s working for you. Is it helping to reduce the self-harm too? Hope you enjoy your chill-out time.

    Dawn

    • roseroars Says:

      I’m pretty sure that one million bucks Australian is like, $1.54.

      I thought for sure you would have something similar inside. If you try it let me know how it works for you.

      My self-harm has been better, but I think that’s more due to making sure everyone inside is safe before being intimate, processing new memories, etc.

      No time to chill! Must clean!!!! Ahhhhhh!!!!!

  2. Bee Says:

    I have a similar type of “team”, but it is more of a “comfort room” for the younger alters who get upset by something or have a memory come back up during the day or a trigger. It basically does the same thing as your team, only mine doesn’t always work for the really severe stuff. I don’t know why that is and I hope one day I can change that so it will be more effective for the severe things as well. Thanks for sharing. I really like hearing what you are finding that works and doesn’t work. It gives me ideas of things to try 🙂

    -Bee

    • roseroars Says:

      Good and thank you very much! Sometimes I think I’m nuts because 1. I’ll try anything to heal/help everyone inside and 2. I never know what people will think about my ideas or practices. If you ever decide to try something please tell me how it goes or how you have improved upon it.

      Inside is a place for the younger ones to go to before I become intimate, talk, read, or watch something they shouldn’t see. They have snacks, toys, and older ones help them out. It works very well.

      I think the ETMRT works well because I’m very insistent and don’t back down with the memories/alters, but I am loving and accepting as well.

  3. Lothlorien Says:

    What an amazing plan! We do not have a plan like that, although my system has a really good checks and balances where older parts take care of and comfort younger parts. This, of course, after some years of therapy. I like your plan!
    ~ Lothlorien

    • roseroars Says:

      Thanks for the compliment! I was diagnosed in March, so we are still trying things out and this is helping quite a bit. It only took me 25 years to get to this point! 😉

  4. castorgirl Says:

    I think I have something similar… not sure. I know that when a young one has come forward in therapy, there is usually an older one to take them back to safety. I also have an internal attic that has one kick-arse protector who ensures that no one messes with the young ones in her care, and is always there if one of them comes forward. There’s also a nurturer one other floor who looks after some of the young ones. I admit, I don’t think I’m all that good at taking care of the young ones in my system.

    It sounds like you have developed an amazing response though… not only is it nurturing for the one with the memory, but gives a vital job to two other parts who also need validation and a place in the system. It also keeps you safe and functioning in public. So it’s a win-win all around. Kudos…

    Try not to get caught up in numbers within the system. You read my entry about the young one at work… well I had no idea she existed until then. So the numbers are meaningless in many respects. The system was as big as it needed to be to cope with what you experienced, and some parts/memories will remain hidden until you are ready to cope with what they hold.

    Take care,
    CG

    • roseroars Says:

      I’m always asking my therapist “Am I doing okay?”, “Will I be okay?”, and I feel like I did okay by setting this up. I feel excited about telling her this Wednesday that the ETMRT is working well.

      Last night, around 10 pm, I first read your response. When I got to “…Try not to get caught up in numbers within the system.” it felt like a whoosh inside and someone came through. So, I needed to call the ETMRT as hubby and I were pricing out riding lawn mowers at the time. The girl who came through behaved like another and I didn’t realize she was new, plus she was fighting my response team like crazy. It worked out okay in the end, but I know I said some strange things out loud and hubby was saying “Wow. You really are tired.”. The system gets larger and I wonder if I’ll be able to keep track of it. I don’t want anyone to feel left out.

      • Meredith Says:

        Your system isn’t getting larger–really. Getting that idea in place will make everything so much easier. You’re the very, very same person you’ve always been. It’s just that, now, you’re seeing more of yourself.

        Once, I asked my therapist how many parts I had, and she just laughed and told me that she quit keeping track after the first couple hundred. I I did not find the news at all funny–in fact, I walked out of my session, ready to quit. That was… oh, 15 years ago.

        Sigh..

      • roseroars Says:

        Thank you! That is the way to think of it! It doesn’t make me feel better, but you are (again) absolutely right. I have to keep that in mind.

        Thank you, thank you.


  5. […] come through, as well as a nasty memory. My super-supportive ETMRT needed to be called in also: https://roseroars.wordpress.com/2010/05/21/emergency-traumatic-memory-response-team/ Well…we […]


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